Day#7 100LB WeightLoss Journey
I HATE *that* look. It infuriates me and saddens me. Not to mention that I end up allowing *it* to set me back four steps in my journey.
Its the look that most fat, overweight, obese people get from others that ends up being the reason why most fat people binge eat….well…I know I’ve done it…
But, just when I thought I didn’t care quite as much about *that* look…I received it from someone that I love and had thought that they loved me “as I am”….but, then, last night…I got that disapproving look…the ones that in my brain sounds like “How can she do that to herself? I thought she was trying to get healthy? She knows she shouldn’t eat that”……………I really hate *that* look…it is degrading, painful, and saddening.
I’ve received that look at the grocery store when people see chips or ice cream or whatever in my cart, or when I am at a restaurant eating not so healthy food, or when I get the large popcorn at the movie theatre…..I even have received *that* look from other family members…my Aunt gave it to me when we were at Bingo one night and I ate two small bags of chips..she was horrified (even though she is large herself)….
I also hate the fact that I allow *that* look to have such an affect on me. I had started to learn to ignore it. I had learned to focus on the fact that- if I am the one choosing what goes in my body, I need to pay the consequences….but, last night…..it hurt…a lot….and I got *that* look from my husband. Whether he is aware that he gave it to me or not, I don’t know…but, he did and it struck me like a knife.
I was walking back from the kitchen with a snack/kids half bowl with ice cream – approximately 1 scoop of ice cream in it and a glass of pop (yeah I know water would have been a much better choice!) and as I was walking past the living room, he looked up from his tv show and this is when I received *that* look.
Now, I had already had popcorn that night and it was later in the evening…2 reasons why I probably got *that* look…but…that isn’t what your brain first thinks when you receive it(it, as in *that* look).
But, I am able to let go of it now that I have written about it…for today anyways..I’m sure I will get *that* look again…I definitely want to be more aware of it, and maybe even question people on it when I catch them giving it to me.
I know I am guilty of giving *that* look to people who are my size and bigger…I don’t mean to..and I am sure *most* people do not intend to do it…but, there are those out there who are so disgusted by fat people that they give it whether the person is eating or not.
I don’t have much more to say on this for now…perhaps I will think more about it….and dig a little deeper.
Workout for Day #7 done! BeachBody – Body Gospel – Workout – Body Revelation. I’ve made a week into the New Year! Woot! Now to work on the better eating..today I am going to give Shakeology a go…I’ll keep ya posted on that one!
Posted on January 7, 2014, in Click HERE to read my day to day posts of my "100LB WeightLoss Journey " and tagged 100lb weightloss journey, 100lbs, BeachBody, Body Gospel, getting healthy, losing weight, obese, weightloss. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.